Chapter 216

 

Warning: This is an —M— chapter

 

CHAPTER 216

 

July

 

We stayed for months at Opis but, as soon as summer arrived and the heat became a nuisance, we moved to Ecbatana. You do remember Ecbatana, I hope. One of the imperial Persian cities, surrounded by tall strong walls of different colors that made it look more like a fortress than a palace. A fortress on top of a hill, almost like a fairy tale, we only needed the dragon breathing fire and everything would have been like a fantasy story.

 

Once you asked me if I felt something when I thought about this city. I feel many things. It became the last place that saw me alive, the end of my beginning.  Have you ever imagined how would be your last day on this world? I never did but if I had devoted time to such meditations I’m sure I would have never imagined I would exhale my last breath here. 

 

I had plans for the future, I was so busy and had so many things to do that it was impossible to even consider the possibility that I would never see the end of that year… But I am changing the subject. We’ll get to that in time.

 

Alexander’s idea was to stay in Ecbatana until winter and then move to Babylon. I thought Drypetis would be more comfortable in Babylon reason why I sent her directly to the ancient city of Nebuchadnezzar, leaving Susa whenever she wanted or when she were ready. I tried to write to her often and every now and then I sent a gift, sometimes small things, others, more magnificent presents. She was happy and that meant a lot to me.  I think if I had had more time I would have learned to love her as a very dear friend, she a very sweet person.

 

Berenike had stayed behind with her, Vashti and Thais, but since she was incapable of being far from Leonnatos she reached Ecbatana shortly after we did. Thais was with her, now with 6 months of pregnancy, but Vashti and her girls stayed with my Princess. Despite what the hetaira and my sister had thought Ptolemy was actually happy with the news of the baby and the relationship between the 2 of them changed very little.

 

Another one who reached us at Ecbatana was Roxanne. The same as I Alexander had sent his wives directly to Babylon, but Roxanne disobeyed and came to us. Undoubtedly to be close to Perdikkas and the King, to be at court where the important things were happening. She did not want to be left behind, never gave up and came with all the intentions of looking for the best way to improve her situation. 

 

Achilles’ problems on the other hand, were the same as they were at Opis. Every time he had Seleucus in front of him he was unable to say 3 simple words that would ease his heart, but I didn’t blame him…

 

— When I was 2 years older than you –had said Hephaistion one day— I was unable to tell Alexander ‘I love you.’

 

 — Really? Why? –this news had truly caught the Prince’s attention, he had always imagined the beginning of his fathers’ relationship as a tale where everything was perfect and the characters fell in love at first sight.

 

— I was scared and confused –the Chiliarch confessed— For Alexander it was so easy to say ‘I love you’ that I felt overwhelmed. What if I really didn’t love him? I didn’t want to confess my feelings so soon and later discover I was mistaken. I guess that was what scared me the most, to make a mistake.

 

Achilles nodded, he understood perfectly because he had the same feeling.

 

— But you weren’t mistaken.

 

— No, I wasn’t –Hephaistion smiled at him— But I had no way of knowing this then. Did I ever tell you that I hated Alexander? –the Prince laughed.

 

— No!

 

— Well, I hated him with all my forces –the Chiliarch remembered when they met, who would have thought he would fell in love with the Prince that almost crush him under his horse?— And I couldn’t stand him.

 

— What made you change your mind? –asked his son intrigued.

 

— I got to know him –said Hephaistion— And I learned to trust in my instincts –he took his son by the shoulder— Aki, you know better than anyone what is that you feel, but never be afraid of your own feelings. Follow your instincts, you are the first person you need to learn to trust.

 

— I’ll do it –the Prince nodded— Just give me time, but I will do it.

 

Our problems weren’t all personal. Sadly but now Alexander was having a lot of troubles with Greece, which at this point, was an utterly chaos. Alexander had the brilliant idea of asking to be recognized as a God in Macedonia and the Greek cities and, as you can well imagine, that shocked and angered a lot of people. Antipater was especially adamant in his refusal to recognize the King’s divinity.

 

But this wasn’t all, as was expected, the Greek cities had several problems with their returning mercenaries and, to complicate everything, Hapalos was back in the picture.

 

— Harpalos is at Athens –said Alexander, while a group of mosquitoes were happily buzzing near him and worsening his mood— He asked for help and the Athenians put him under arrest. They want me to grant Athens control over Samos and, in return, they will hand me Harpalos. 

 

Hephaistion thought for a moment about this, cleaning the sweat from his forehead. They had left Opis because of the heat but here the weather wasn’t very different— I always knew the man was bad news but I never thought it would be his bad. 

 

— It’s a good bargain –he said at last.

 

— Not one that I am looking forward to grant but…

 

— Alex –said the Chiliarch slowly— You already have a lot of problems in Greece, and unless you are planning to go to Athens any time soon, I say give them Samos and end with this –he scared a mosquito with his hand— Harpalos is dangerous, he has money and armed men with him and, if he approaches the wrong people, he could very well start a revolt against you. Greece is full with unhappy people and you made many enemies after the satrap’s purge.

 

The King grumbled something under his breath. This was not what he had planned, not even what he wanted, but he couldn’t deny Hephaistion was right— It’s incredible but someone may think I have more problems now than when I began the campaign. When I left Pella everything was simple and the goal was clear. Now my men are unhappy, the satraps are not trustworthy, Greece is again unstable and even Antipater is refusing my orders to recognize my own divinity.  

 

— Fine, but this doesn’t make me happy…Ouch! –he exclaimed when his beloved slap his cheek with force— What was that for? 

 

— You had a mosquito on your cheek –Hephaistion explained. 

 

— Wretched animals! They are everywhere –the King complained— At least, I guess we must be grateful Aki is not allergic to them. 

 

— Yes, indeed.

 

XXX

 

Alexander’s 32th birthday was next day and celebrations with a splendid banquet were prepared in his honor— 32, I met the bastard when he was 12 –that thought made Hephaistion smile although not for long. He had been squeezing his brain to find a suitable present to the King, especially now that he wanted to cheer him up, but hadn’t come out with anything.

 

His lover was overwhelmed with so many problems and crisis that the Chiliarch was looking for something to make him feel better, to take his mind out of this and relax him…but what? He was walking near the stables when a groom came out running with a rope in his hand. The boy almost collided with him and terrible ashamed apologized himself before continuing his way— Rope…rope? –he remembered then something Alexander had told him and a smile curved his lips. Now he knew what to do.

 

Hephaistion ran back to his room, like child, laughing alone and jumping the stairs, and then saw his son walking in the garden with Seleucus. He stopped for a moment. Since that night when Achilles came crying to his room the Prince hadn’t talked to Demetrius and was still trying to gather his courage and confess his feeling to the archihypaspistes– I hope today is the day –again he felt frustrated, he wanted to help his son but was unable to do it. What could he possible do? Nothing more than be there for him— This is something he has to do by himself –and the Chiliarch continued his way.

 

XXX

 

Achilles had tried for 2 weeks to be brave like his father and confess his feelings to Seleucus but, every time he had the opportunity to talk to him something happened. It was like a curse!— But not today, today I will do it –he wanted to settle things first with the archihypaspistes before talking to Demetrius, somehow he felt it was the right thing to do after all, this situation had began because he couldn’t accept what he felt for him.

 

They walked until they reach a hidden part of the garden, safely away from curious eyes among bushes and trees, a soft breeze carrying the fountain’s water hit them like morning dew over flowers, refreshing that hot afternoon and helping Achilles to clear his mind— I have to do it now –the Prince stopped in front of the archihypaspistes, so suddenly that Seleucus would have run into him haven’t he being paying attention.

 

— You have been acting pretty weird lately –said Seleucus, crossing his arms and cocking his head. He knew something was happening, something had charged, could it be thanks to Antigonos’ son?

 

Have Achilles fallen in love with the kid? –that thought scared the archihypaspistes. He could understand if that was the case, after all Demetrius was almost the same age of the Prince, 5 moths older, and they had more things in common than he had with Achilles— I am one year older than his fathers after all. 

 

What would he do if that was the case? Would he accept Achilles’ decision? Deep inside Seleucus knew the answer and he wasn’t ready to renounce to the Prince— I love him too much to simply step aside. I will fight for him if someone ever tries to take him from me. 

 

— I know, it’s just…I have no idea of how to say this –Achilles admitted, extremely nervous— It’s so difficult and…

 

—Are you breaking up with me? –the archihypaspistes asked, unable to wait, the suspense was killing him and he had always been a bad loser. If his Prince had fallen in love with the kid he wanted, he needed, to know now.  

 

Achilles blinked adorably confused and laughed, he laughed so hard that now it was Seleucus’ turn to be confused and utterly lost.

 

— No! Of course not! –said Achilles unable to stop laughing. How could Seleucus come up with something like this?— Gods! You are so serious. Why did you think that?

 

And for the first time since they met the Prince made the archihypaspistes blush. He felt like an idiot.

 

— Just… forget it –said Seleucus very uncomfortable— What do you want to tell me?

 

Achilles took several breaths and, when he finally stopped laughing, he felt again that cold grip in his guts. He fell silent and looked at his hands as if wanting them to give him a magical answer—Why is this so difficult?…But daddy is right, I have to learn to trust myself.

 

— Seleucus…I have…been thinking and I…I have feelings for you –he said at last. His face was burning and his hands trembling. He clenched his cloths. Now he had the complete attention of the archihypaspistes who let his arms fall at his sides. Seleucus’ heart beat faster and, in those moments, he felt like a teenager again.

 

— Feelings how? –he needed to ask but this only served to blush the Prince even more— Do you love me? –it took Achilles a moment to answer that. 

 

— Yes –the Prince spoke before thinking, from the bottom of his heart and Seleucus gave him a sweet adorable smile of infinite happiness that no one, before this day, had knew him. He didn’t let the Prince speak again, the archihypaspistes embraced him, carrying him and spinning with his Prince like a schoolboy.

 

XXX

 

When night fell Hephaistion had everything ready. Kyros had helped him to get what he needed and he had done the same as that night many years ago when they were celebrating the fall of Tyre– I insist, this so uncomfortable, and a little humiliating, but terrible practical –the Chiliarch prepared himself with oil before the party, feeling his face blushing and imagining the walls had eyes and were judging him. He had troubles to sit and maintain a cool and detach exterior, but he made his best too look as if nothing were happening there.

 

The only thing standing between him and his plans for that night was Alexander’s cup of wine, which Hephaistion was staring as if it were his worst enemy— If Alex keeps drinking like this it will happen the same thing I suffered at Persepolis –he puffed his cheeks out angrily. As was the King’s custom lately, he was drinking more than before and his beloved had to take the cup away from him.  

 

— Why did you do that? –Alexander protested. 

 

— Because I have a surprise for you and I need you sober –answered his Chiliarch with a big evil smile that spoke volumes of his intentions.

 

— What kind of surprise? –asked Alexander intrigued and his beloved moved closer, ignoring the music, voices and laughs around them and concentrating only in his lover.

 

— The kind you like –he whispered in his ear in a voice that made the King’s hormones boiled.

 

— Can we go now? –Alexander asked like a child who had been promised a big delicious candy.

 

— It’s up to you, my love –Hephaistion moved away— This is your party after all. 

 

And that settled it. The King stayed just long enough to not appear rude and, in the first opportunity he had, disappeared with Hephaistion to the royal chambers. There were very few things that could make Alexander behave like a fool and one of those things had a name and a magnificent body that had him salivating while following him through the corridors.

 

XXX

 

Achilles never knew when his fathers left, busy as he was, sharing his couch with Seleucus and laughing happily at the archihypaspistes’ story. He felt better now, much better, almost as if a heavy rock had been lifted from his shoulders and, for the first time since they started to sleep together, he felt truly comfortable at Seleucus’ side, not caring anymore if people knew he was his lover and completely unaware of Perdikkas expression of absolute hate watching them there.

 

Aki could have been very smart and mature but never forget he was still a teenager of 14 years old who still needed much to live and learn, especially regarding his personal love life. He never paid much attention to Perdikkas, ignoring him most of the time and never speaking to anybody about that day when my friend was so close to rape him…no one except Chrys knew about it, Chrys and many years later Seleucus. But then, it was already too late…

 

— Is your father still alive? –asked Achilles with curiosity. Now that the Prince thought about it he knew very little about his lover’s life and he wanted to correct that mistake.

 

— What do you mean? I am not that old –the archihypaspistes complained with a big smile. He was so happy that appeared to glow.

 

— How touchy. Daddy is younger than you and my grandfather Amyntor is dead –Achilles rested his back against the cushions and rested his legs on Seleucus’ thighs for the older’s utterly pleasure.

 

— Fair enough. Yes, my father is alive and very happy in Upper Macedonia –answered the archihypaspistes.

 

— What’s his name?

 

— Antiochus. He served in King Philip’s military staff for many years and went back home when a spear wounded his right leg –Seleucus answered, caressing the Prince’s legs— He can barely move it and my mother convinced him to retire. 

 

— Do you have siblings?

 

— Just one sister.

 

— Did you serve as a page with my grandfather Philip?

 

— Yes, and before you ask yes, I saw your fathers at the palace but we never talked –said Seleucus reading his mind— I never was part of Alexander’s close friends and only saw Hephaistion a couple of times. But I knew he hated Alexander –the archihypaspistes laughed remembering that— How things changed, don’t you think?

 

Achilles was going to open his mouth when…

 

— Aki, I want to talk to you –when the Prince turned he found Demetrius standing there and that successfully erased his smile. He felt a hollow in his stomach and all his wits abandoned him when he was those green eyes on him.

 

— Yes, of course –Achilles stood up, feeling a little embarrassed after been found there with his lover. He turned and said to Seleucus— I’ll be back in a moment.

 

It did not pass unnoticed for the Prince the look of absolute hatred Demetrius gave to the archihypaspistes but it ended before Achilles could do as much as to open his mouth. The page leaded the way to the balcony, he didn’t say a word while they walked and that only served to increased the Prince’s anxiety. Achilles had no idea of what Demetrius could possible want but— He called me ‘Aki’, maybe he is no longer angry with me –he felt the tiny light of hope burning inside his heart.  

 

— Dris, I…—he decided to end with that terrible silence but…

 

— I am sorry, Aki –the page interrupted him— I am truly sorry after what…after what happened on my birthday –the Prince fell silent for a moment, truly lost and not knowing how to answer that. 

 

— You don’t have to apologize –said Achilles at long last— I am the one who lie to you and…I am sorry, Dris…I should have told you before about my feelings for Seleucus.

 

— So, you do love him –this time Demetrius wasn’t asking, and the Prince nodded, not failing to notice the resentment in his friend’s voice.

 

— Yes.

 

Silence again. The sounds of the party appeared to be something coming from another world, only the 2 boys existed in that moment where the only thing Achilles could do was watch his friend wondering what could he be thinking— He is jealous of Seleucus –that much was obvious but the question there was, what was the page thinking to do about it?

 

— Aki, I want to be honest with you –said the page— I love you and I want to be your friend…

 

— Me too! –exclaimed the Prince, maybe too eagerly— I mean, I miss you and I love you too…just not the way you want me, but I want you to be my friend, my best friend.

 

Demetrius smiled.

 

— I’m happy to hear that but…I want you to know that I won’t give up –said the page, his voice full with determination— You may not love me now but, one day you will.

 

I have to admit that, when Aki told me about this conversation, I smiled and didn’t think it was important…Years showed me how wrong I was. Demetrius always loved Achilles, the same as Seleucus, even after my son’s death, and both hated each other and fought to inherit Achilles’ kingdom until…Well, that’s another story.

 

XXX

 

As soon as Alexander and Hephaistion reached the royal chambers, the King found nothing especial waiting for them, which made Alexander feel a little disappointed— I don’t know what I was waiting to find  –or maybe he knew, beginning with a naked and very horny Hephaistion and ending with…He cleared his throat and walked to the bed when something on the mattress caught his attention.

 

— A rope? –asked the King confused, taking the rope made of pure silk— You bring me here because of a rope? –he turned to face Hephaistion and gasped when he found his beloved gloriously naked at his side. He opened and closed his mouth unable to speak.  

 

He had seen Hephaistion naked more time than he could count but that night, he looked astonishing, the pale light of the moon, coming through the opened window, appeared to caress his creamy skin and the fickle light of the candles made his eyes look purple. Alexander felt how his brain activity was reduced to half and how his entire body reacted before this vision of beauty— He is truly a God, because no mortal should be this beautiful. 

 

— Well, I remember you saying that… –the Chiliarch closed the distance between them, dragging the words, like silk caressing the King’s body— You wanted to tie me to your bed.

 

I say that? –in those moments Alexander forgot even his own name.

 

— So…what do you say? –purred Hephaistion.

 

— About what? –the Chiliarch almost laughed, watching the 2 red spots on his lover’s cheeks and the black expression on his face where the only thing you could find was pure love mixed with lust.

 

— Aren’t you going to tie me? –that question sounded sinfully hot coming from Hephaistion and the only thing Alexander could do was nod.

 

Neither had an idea of how to this and the only thing the King could think was to tie Hephaistion face up, his arms together over his head and his legs spread with the knees bent up. The Chiliarch tried to move but it was impossible, Alexander had done a great job but, at the same time, he hadn’t hurt his beloved— My great ideas, I can’t close my legs and if someone comes in…—Hephaistion blushed thinking about it.

 

How embarrassing situation!— Embarrassing and unlikely, who would enter the Great King’s chambers without his permission? –he sighed, trying his best to relax. He was terribly expose but, that feeling along with the intense gaze of his lover caressing his body with savage hunger shining in his uneven eyes, had the Chiliarch painfully aroused— I’m sick.

 

— Phai, you look…—Alexander’s body shuddered, words failed to describe that creature of impossible beauty at his complete mercy. He could do anything, whatever he wanted to Hephaistion and he would be unable to stop him and that, even if it were a dangerous, disturbing thought had the King’s body tense with unsatisfied desire.

 

— What are you waiting? A formal invitation? –even in that situation the Chiliarch found in himself to sound challenging, to tease him and keep that air of untamed beast that could make the all mighty Alexander tremble from head to toe. 

 

— I think, I am the one in charge here –said the King with all his royal authority.

 

— And what is your royal majesty going to do with his humble subject?

 

— You have no idea.

 

Alexander kissed and worshiped that perfect body that had filled his days with joy and his nights with passion for 19 years, covering him with caresses and hungry kisses, sliding his lips through his strong legs and magnificent thighs, his eager fingers following, dragged over his skin, feeling his beloved’s muscles contracting under his touch. He could feel how Hephaistion tried to close his legs when his wet lips reached his crotch, shuddering and sighing, moaning softly and panting slightly. 

 

It gave the Chiliarch goosebumps to feel the tip of his lover’s tongue teasing him, his nose brushing his hard desire almost like accident, snatching louder and louder moans from his throat. 19 years and Hephaistion felt as if Alexander were touching him for the very first time, those hands that knew him so well sliding up and down his thighs, his thumbs almost burning his oversensitive skin.

 

Following a reflex the Chiliarch tried to move his arms but found himself deliciously restrain by the rope. It was such a strange sensation, being unable to do as his body asked. His own fingers throbbed wanting to feel the King’s skin, his mouth wanted to kissed his body but he couldn’t. Hephaistion closed his eyes and surrendered himself to the mercy of his lover, feeling his cruel tongue teasing him without feeding the growling hunger threatening to drive him crazy. 

 

— Mmm…Alex, please…just…Nn…touch me…do something…—he begged, panting, his hair falling over his blushed hot face. He felt lost in a whirlwind of sensations and only wanted to feel Alexander more closely, he wanted the King to touch his very soul.

 

— Not so fast, my love –the King smiled at him— We have all night.

 

He is kidding me –but he wasn’t. Alexander took his time. Savoring and licking his torso, dragging his fingers over his undulating abdomen, looking for his nipple. He was rewarded by a long moan that made his nervous system dance and Hephaistion arched as he could, restrain as he was, his body melting and dissolving while his lover sucked the tender skin, brushing it with his teeth. 

 

— Alex…please…I…can’t…Mmmm…—but instead of stopping his caresses Alexander took his hands between his beloved’s legs, sucking him at the same time he slid his hand up and down his length. Hephaistion screamed with all his forces, not caring if the entire palace or the people at the town heard him, and found his release…But it was not the end.

 

The King started all over again, kissing him, touching him and teasing him, resting on all four over Hephaistion, leaving a trail of wet kissing along his neck all the way up looking for that sensitive skin behind his ear while burying his fingers inside him. Alexander took his time, playing inside him with his fingers, scissoring them and it did not take him long to have his beloved moaning again, once again begging to be taken and this time, Alexander granted his wish.

 

It was like sliding over silk and satin, with such ease he was resting inside Hephaistion. Both moaned and panted, trapped in a decadent rhythm they had enjoyed so many times but that would never tired them. The Chiliarch’s body appeared to dissolve in moans and sighs as the King thrust inside him, becoming truly one with him.   

 

This is how it must be –thought Hephaistion in that state between dreams and reality where his body appeared to float and his soul to burn having Alexander inside him.

 

— All right I…have to admit…your present was…the best of all… –panted the King, resting at his beloved’s side. 

 

The Chiliarch rubbed his arms and took a deep breath.

 

— I knew you…would like it –he turned to kiss Alexander’s cheek. They fell silent for a moment, hearing only their rapid breathing and the beating of their hearts against their ears.

 

— Next year –the King spoke in whispers, his uneven eyes on the ceiling— We’ll have…20 years of being together –Hephaistion turned to rest on his side, facing him. His legs still felt a little numb after being tied but little by little he was regaining sensation.

 

— 20 years…they went so fast –he mused a moment— So many things happened in 20 years.

 

— We are living more than many old men –answered Alexander— I bet you that Antipater at his age hasn’t seen half the things we have. 

 

— Yes, I agree but I wasn’t talking about that –said Hephaistion, resting his face on his hands— I was thinking about us, about all the things you and I lived together.

 

— Oh! –his beloved smiled.

 

— At this point Alex, I think there is nothing that could happen to make me hate you –said Hephaistion with all honesty— We have lived so much together…—he looked for the King’s hand— That I would be a fool to doubt your love.

 

Alexander moved closer and kissed his lips.

 

— I feel the same way…but that doesn’t mean I would have you sleeping with whomever you want –the Chiliarch laughed.

 

— I know…I know.

 

XXX

 

Why am I here? –Hephaistion looked around, at the crypt’s walls. It was an old place, it smelled musty and to rotten vegetation, moldy and to forgotten dreams, it smelled to death and despair— What is this place? –he walked around, barely seeing thanks to the only lonely lamp lit inside. He was trapped, but how long had he been there? It felt like many, many years had passed but Hephaistion wasn’t sure.

 

2,000 years –someone appeared to whisper at his side, sending shivers through his body—Have I been here for that long? –that was ridiculous and yet, somehow, deep inside he knew it was true.  

 

Step back, watch me closely;

As crimson wings unfold you'll see me as I am,

I know it won't be easy,

But in the end you'll understand,

My instinctive need to fly.

(Stream of Passion, Deceiver)

 

The man was there, sitting in his usual place— But I don’t want to see his face –he was scared and wanted nothing more than leave…

 

When Hephaistion woke up he was trembling, as if he had been naked in the snow instead of lying at the side of Alexander in a summer night at Ecbatana. He curled against his snoring lover and embraced him like a child scared of the monster under the bed— It’s a dream, it’s only a dream –or it was not?