Chapter 207

 

CHAPTER 207

 

The King had called his satraps with the pretext of gathering provisions before marching again, this time, to Persepolis; but the truth was he was setting his affairs in order. He hadn’t taken the time to actually organize that vast empire he acquired through blood and steal, hardships and suffering for 9 years; always looking for his next campaign, his next adventure, but the desert had showed him he was surrounded by enemies, and so this task became imperative. He could not delay it anymore.

 

He also ordered his satraps to disband their mercenaries, just like Artaxerxes Ochus had done before him many many years ago and did something he should have done before, he summoned Harpalos, ready to settle things with his treasurer once and for all but, as soon as his so-called friend heard about Cleander’s execution, who by the way was the late Koinos’ brother, he fled…

 

— Harpalos is on his way to Athens. ATHENS! –exclaimed Alexander furious, pacing around his audience chamber. Again, he was attired in Persian clothes, magnificent pieces or art embroidery in thread of gold, pearls and jewels but that did nothing but upset his already unhappy Macedonian troops— He took with him 6,000 mercs and 5,000 talents in silver. Can you believe that? 

 

I knew this was going to happen –thought his beloved. Some times he hated to be right. Many years ago when they studied at Mieza the commander had disliked Harpalos tremendously and not only because the man complained a lot about him, but also because he sensed something, something Hephaistion could not describe with words but that time had proven to him right.

 

— Alex, don’t get mad, but I can very well believe it –said Hephaistion with calm— I told you, I warned you about Harpalos but you did not want to listen.

 

— He robbed me! The motherless dog robbed ME, after all I did for him, and now he is running to Athens after the Athenians granted him the citizenship for saving them from the famine. He sent them grain bought with MY money and now he is the hero –for a moment the commander was sure the vein on his forehead was really going to explode— But listen to me Phai, this is not over, I swear it is not and if I ever get my hands on Harpalos… —he growled. 

 

Hephaistion said nothing. The last weeks had been difficult for the 2 of them, not only they had narrowly escaped death after 60 days in the desert, as soon as they came back to the civilization, Alexander was welcome by a mountain of problems and letters, and among those his mother’s letters had proven to be the hardest to deal with. Olympias had taken the time to write to him not 1, not 2 but 6 different letters with a litany of complains about Antipater and, what had the King in an especially bad mood, about Hephaistion. Since the commander became more and more important, so her complains increased. 

 

If you were to believe Queen Olympias then Hephaistion was plotting to seize power and was manipulating Alexander as the most sinister and skillful evil mastermind the world had ever seen. Hephaistion knew about the Queen’s letters but he hadn’t read them, he only knew she was angry with him and Alexander was angry with her— Maybe I should write to her myself, instead of helping she always manages to complicate everything.

 

XXX

 

Hephaistion went to his room, walking through the corridors of the palace at Salmous. He needed to change his cloths to receive the envoys from Egypt. Alexander still had to deal with Cleomenes, the Greek who was in all but name satrap of Egypt, who had the most scandalous record of corruption and embezzlement but, the main difference between him and Harpalos, was that Cleomenes never stopped sending money to the King, he was loyal and efficient and the commander was sure Alexander would ratify him in his post without much problems.

 

Hephaistion yawned. He was very tired, it was almost as if he needed to rest for 60 days to get over that dreadful march through the desert, every night he went to sleep feeling his body was falling apart but had so many things on his mind that was unable to rest, staring at his ceiling for hours and just getting 4 or 5 hours of sleep…except when he and Alexander made love of course, then he would sleep better than most babies— I am getting old or just a perv –he thought with a smile.

 

He was reaching his bedroom when he found Bagoas leaving the room he had insisted on having ready for his son. Hephaistion was sure Achilles was alive and would come back so, he insisted in having a room ready for him. The commander frowned. He did not remember the eunuch was back until he saw him standing there and, since he was still the Crown Prince’s servant, had all the right to be there even if he did not like it.

 

— What are you doing here? –asked Hephaistion in a sharper tone than he had intended, last time they had let the eunuch wandered around at his will, he had ended drugging the commander and planning his possible rape at the hands of Chrysaor.

 

Bagoas bowed his head. He was no longer that youth of 15 years old, delicate and sweet like a maiden, that Nabarzanes had given the King 5 years ago; he was 20 years old now, taller and looking more like a boy though with an effeminate air thanks to his fluid movements and gracious walking. Hephaistion had heard from Xsayarsa that eunuchs used to gain weight as they grew older but the commander saw Bagoas was as slender as a spear— Yarsa… I wonder if you are still alive or I sent you to your death when all I tried to do was save you.

 

— I apologize if I did something wrong, commander –answered Bagoas, his voice still sweet and musical, something that would never change— I came to change the flowers in the Prince’s bedroom –as a proof he showed him a bouquet of old flowers he was planning to throw— I want to keep it perfect when he comes back. 

 

If the eunuch meant what he said was not important in that moments, his words helped to ease Hephaistion’s bad mood— Aki will come back. 

 

— It’s all right, you may go –Bagoas bowed again and the commander left him.

 

XXX

 

Hephaistion was still changing when, for no one’s surprise, Nikandros appeared unannounced and without knocking, storming with a look of barely suppress anger and concern that immediately caught his brother’s attention.

 

— What happened to you?

 

— Is there any news of the fleet? –asked the lochagos without preamble.

 

— None –Hephaistion sighed. He understood perfectly well how his brother felt and wished with all his forces to be able to give him a different answer, to give him some hope, but how could he without lying? 

 

Nikandros cursed.

 

— I can’t wait! I have waited for almost a month and I can’t do it anymore –his brother paced around— I will go myself to look for the fleet.

 

— Nick, that’s stupid. We don’t even know where are they and it could be dangerous if you go alone –said the commander. He too had thought the same, to take a horse and ride along the coast for any signs of the fleet, to ask the locals and get some information but had discarded the idea as soon as it came to him.

 

First of all, he could not leave Alexander, he had worked to do here; second, the King already had people doing this and third, just as he said to his older brother, it was dangerous, especially in their present situation where they did not know whom they could trust.

 

— And what do you want me to do then? Eh?! My family is with the damn fleet. Do you want me just to wait here for news of their death? –his big brother shouted as if all of this were his fault— What if the fleet sank? Have you thought that! It’s been months since the last time we had news from them and I need to know.

 

Hephaistion closed the distance between them, taking the lochagos by the shoulder, forcing him to stop and face him.

 

— My son is with that fleet too so don’t you dare to talk to me as if I did not know how you are feeling –he held Nikandros’ gaze. Probably the only man there worried as he was about Achilles (without counting Alexander of course) was Seleucus, and to hear his brother talking like this was ending with his patience— I need to know too but this is not the way –the lochagos snorted— I hate to wait but, for now, there not much we can do. 

 

It was not the best answer but that was all he got. They could do nothing more but, at least they did not have to wait for long and, a couple of days later, they had news of the fleet.

 

— What is it? –asked Alexander as soon as the messenger appeared before him. It was a young man, not even 20 years old for what Hephaistion could see, his face was blushed and he was panting, clearly he had ran to get here. 

 

I only hope its not more bad news –thought the commander.

 

— I am very sorry to disturb you, sire –said the man, bowing his head— But I have urgent news. The locals claimed to have seen admiral Nearchos with the fleet.

 

Hephaistion’s heart skipped a beat, a myriad of emotions hit him like waves and for a moment it was as if the day had became brighter. It was December and, every day since they left Gedrosia he had waited to hear this news— Please Aki, you have to be fine.

 

— Where? –Alexander stood up, the same as his beloved, assailed by so many different emotions that it was a wonder he was still sane— Is this true? Because if it’s just a false rumor I will have you arrested –he threatened him. He was under a lot of stress and had no patience for rumors and gossip.

 

— Sire, I swear is true –said the man now considerably paler than before— The locals claimed to have seen the fleet in the vicinity and admiral Nearchos is on his way here.

 

Oh please, let it be true –thought Hephaistion, on step of falling on his knees and start thanking...whatever it was that had allowed his son to come back— The man said the fleet had been sighted and Nearchos is on his way here but…that doesn’t mean Aki is fine –how he hated that part of him and now, he was worried again. 

 

— I’ll send a cavalry squadron to meet Nearchos –said the King. It was both a precaution and an honor, if his friend and admiral was still loyal then it could be seen as an escort and if he was not it would be good to have him under guard.

 

The messenger was dismissed and the commander sent a servant to inform Nikandros of what had happened— He deserves to know.

 

XXX

 

The Gods took pity of poor Hephaistion, even if he didn’t believe in them, and that same night Nearchos arrived with 4 of his men, Chrysaor and Achilles for his fathers utterly happiness; all them pale, haggard, without illusions, in rags, long hair and disheveled beard (with the exception of the Prince whose only hair grew on his head). Hephaistion had seen beggars that looked better than them but otherwise they all were fine— My son is back –and the commander would have run and embraced his son, caring one fig of what people may think, but Alexander was quicker. 

 

— Thank all the Gods! Are you fine? –asked the King, looking at Achilles from head to toe. He was thin, too thin and the Gods knew that boy had never been fat; Alexander was able to feel his bones when he embraced him and he did not like it. The Prince was pale, his hair now long reaching his shoulders and dark unhealthy shadows under his eyes making him look terminally ill, but otherwise alive and again with them which was enough for his fathers.

 

— Yes, father –Achilles nodded and coughed— Admiral Nearchos was really good to me.

 

— You are taller –said Hephaistion, approaching the Prince with a big smile on his face. Yes, his son had seen better days but now that they were together again he would take care of him…and that cough. 

 

— I am 14 now –said Achilles proudly, smiling— I guess I had to grow a little.

 

A little? 14? –and that reminded the commander that next month he would be 32. Never before had he felt so old— Time flies –he closed the distance and rubbed Achilles shoulders, he could feel the bone like a dagger under the palm of his hands and immediately sent a slave for the doctor, ignoring the Princes complains assuring him he was fine. 

 

— Nearchos, what happened? –asked Alexander while a servant ran to fetch hot wine for the newcomers— Don’t tell you are the only survivors? –the sole idea made the King felt a hollow in his stomach. 

 

His friend, who looked like an old hermit who hadn’t bathed in years, shook his head.

 

— Everything happened, Alexander –Nearchos answered— But the fleet is complete and safe waiting at Hormuz, rest assure. 

 

The King ordered to prepare dinner for the newcomers, they looked bad enough as to drop dead at any moment and he was not so heartless as to demand a complete report of the events seeing Nearchos in such a sorry state. Hephaistion smiled looking at their son eating avidly everything that was set in front of him but always making an effort to keep his manners, whereas Chrysaor ate as if the world were ending next day, not minding if the King was there or not.

 

Alexander waited until his admiral had recovered his forces, showing now more color and a round belly under his rags, and then, Nearchos gave them a full account of what had happened during the past months.

 

— A storm kept us from reaching you at the rendezvous point in Gedrosia –explained the admiral— We were not counting with the monsoon winds and it was impossible to advance. We had to stop and wait for the weather to improve, and when it did, we could at last sailed but the locals attacked us constantly. Apparently rumor was that you were lost in the Makran desert and this gave them courage to revolt.

 

Alexander nodded. He had heard the same story too many times for his liking, apparently everyone had revolted as soon as they thought he was dead.  

 

— I heard about the revolt, but please, continue –Nearchos nodded. 

 

— We lost part of the supplies in another storm and were forced to raid a town and strip it for its provisions –the admiral continued, scratching his beard. Hephaistion couldn’t avoid thinking that an entire family of fleas must have made their home there— We went hungry and had a difficult time because the coastline turned out to be barren and inhospitable. We even had to eat 7 camels –he sighed— I am very sorry, Alexander; I know you were counting with us but…

 

— The important thing is you are all here and the fleet is safe –said Alexander, looking at his son so happy that he appeared to glow. Not only his Prince was back with them, Nearchos hadn’t betrayed him and the fleet was once again at his disposal –We have to thank the Gods for this, they saved the fleet and saved us from the desert.

 

XXX

 

Achilles was immediately attended by the doctors who said that, besides of being terrible thin and to suffer an infestation of fleas, he was fine but needed rest to recover from his cough. Alexander saw that his son were treated like the Prince he was and gave a direct order to the cook to be ready at all times. If his son woke up in the middle of the night asking for apple pie, he would have apple pie. The King had truly feared losing his beloved and his son and now that both were with him he would take care of them. 

 

Next day preparations were made to transport the crew to Salmous but Nikandros did not wait them to arrive, he took a horse and went alone to look for his family, finding his girls very thin but well and happy to be with him again. Roxanne arrived too, looking no better than the rest but making an effort to look as the Queen of beggars, Alexander refused to receive her in person and ordered to set her quarters at the other side of the palace. He did not want to see her. 

 

Kyros, Xsayarsa and his servant Atash were back again, and the Theban and the eunuch ran to embrace Hephaistion in the same moment he appeared in front of them. 

 

— Peris! It was horrible!!! –Xsayarsa cried, embracing his patron on his right side while Kyros did the same on the left, making the commander feel like huge teddy bear— I thought I was going to die! Imagine what waste to the world! –Hephaistion just patted his back, his other arm surrounding the Theban.

 

— You are here, Yarsa –he tried to console him, he could not breath but had no heart to say that and ruin the emotive moment— That is all that matters.

 

— I thought we were sinking –said Kyros, trembling.

 

— I don’t want to travel again by ship, never again, do you hear me? –the commander sighed and the eunuch sobbed— Poor Achilles, I thought he was dying too. 

 

That caught Hephaistion’s attention and despite the lack of air he made an effort to ask...

 

— What happened to Aki? –Xsayarsa finally let him go to blow his nose before answering.

 

— He fell sick –answered the eunuch— And frankly I am not surprise, the storm was terrible and the poor boy could not breath for days. Vashti took care of him, trying her best to keep him warm and always preparing hot beverages –he blew his nose again.

 

— The admiral was terrified –Kyros continued the story— He truly thought Aki was dying and had no idea how was he going to face the King if this happened. He scared the hell out of all of us! 

 

I’ll have to thank Vashti –he thought, wondering why Achilles hadn’t told them a thing of this— He doesn’t want to worry us and, besides, he hates when people look at him as if he were invalid. 

 

— Now is all over, rest Yarsa and prepare yourself because Alexander is planning great celebrations in other of the Gods for saving us all –said Hephaistion with a smile and his eunuch embraced him again— Yarsa.

 

— Yes, Peris?

 

—  You can move your hand from my butt –the eunuch laughed like a little girl making Kyros laugh too. 

 

XXX

 

Seleucus had been at the verge of a nervous breakdown since they emerged from the burning sands of the desert only to find that Nearchos and the fleet had disappeared. He knew Achilles was with them and for days, weeks, months, had moved like an automat, like a living death, wandering through the corridors of the King’s residence, pale and worried, feeling as if his soul had been suck out from his body. 

 

If there had been a point in which the archihypaspistes had doubted his feelings towards the Prince, that moment was already gone and long forgotten. He was in love with the Prince, truly and madly in love with him; and his depression had been equal to his happiness as soon as he heard the wonderful news about Neachos arrival. Three days Seleucus had tried to see Achilles and three days he had failed, he heard the Prince needed to rest and neither, Hephaistion nor Alexander, gave him a moment of respite and so the archihypaspistes had to wait.

 

That night he arrived to the palace with the pretext of supervising his men and, as soon as he finished, went to the Prince’s room, where Bagoas received him and showed him in. Achilles did not look as bad as when he arrived, he had color now, his hair was short again and the fleas were gone after a very painful and humiliated treatment. The servants had to removed every single hair of his body making the Prince wonder why women did this on their own freewill. Luckily he, the same as his father, did not have much hair to remove.  

 

He refused to have all his hair cut and so they only cut it a little, but he was now much better, had been eating properly and rested, as his personal doctor recommended. It had taken Alexander time but at last he decided that Achilles should have a personal doctor, he fell sick too often and had acquired a very skilful Egyptian who, word was, knew how to treat allergies. 

 

Of course Alex should have done this before! But you can hardly blame him for this. At my time we did not know about allergies and we did not pamper our children. If a child was strong enough to survive good, if not he simply died. You have to understand we, Alex and I, were very uncommon for our time and Alex truly thought that, in time, Aki would be stronger. When this did not happen, he looked for a good doctor to take care of him.

 

— You shouldn’t have come –once again was Achilles welcome but this time, something was different, could it be his imagination? No, Seleucus was sure, this time was emotion in his voice.

 

— You are taller –the archihypaspistes observed, walking to close the distance between them, longing to embrace him and kiss him, feeling a strange mixture of anger and concern watching him so thin. He wanted to protect him, to see that nothing bad would ever happen to him, to see he was happy. But he forced himself to wait.

 

— That’s what everybody says –the Prince almost gasped when Seleucus cupped his cheek, he did not see him move, he did not react in time to move away, or maybe he did and just did not want to move. He was confused and so happy to have the archihypaspistes there.

 

— And thin, you’ll have to eat well –he caressed the boy’s cheek with his thumb and Achilles shuddered under his touch.

 

He was a bad liar; he could not even lie to himself. Truth was he had missed the archihypaspistes, more than he wanted to admit, and his heart was beating savagely in his chest, wanting nothing more than to feel him but…— I cannot love him, he cannot be important.

 

— I missed you –whispered Seleucus, kissing his forehead, leaving a trail of kisses over his face, sliding his lips through his cheek— I was so worried about you and I feared to lose you –he left a soft kiss on his lips— I love you, do you love me?

 

— No –but this time he did not sound so sure.

 

XXX

 

Alexander went almost running to Achilles’ room. He had a brilliant idea for the upcoming festivities and wanted to discuss it with his Prince. Achilles’ birthday had been last month and the King was thinking to have a dance contest in his honor. It was fitting after all the King also planned to grant several honors to his friends and high officers so, why not honor his Prince too?— He is 14 already, he should take a more active part in the army and not only as my secretary answering letter, I know he is a sickly boy but he had to fight or the men would never respect him.

 

He was so excited already planning in his head the whole event, of course they would also be athletic competitions, perhaps even literary ones, he had to think it carefully, the only thing he was sure of was that this event had to be spectacular, after all, they were celebrating their conquest of India and the very fact they were alive. And with all those ideas buzzing in his blond head he rushed inside his adopted son’s room without knocking, without calling, without anything. 

 

— Aki, I have a great id…

 

Everything must have happened in a heartbeat, it was fast, very fast and, at the same time, terribly long and slow, as if time had decided to stretch a second turning it into an hour. Alexander had a very clear view of his son naked, panting and moaning, completely arched, under and equally naked, panting and moaning Seleucus thrusting inside him, jerking his slender and delicate figure back and forth.

 

— DAD! –Achilles blushed even more when he saw his adopted father standing in the threshold and, when he shouted, the King appeared to react and left the room, closing the door behind him feeling stunned and lost as if someone had hit him hard on the head.

 

Then, he appeared to react and remember that he was Achilles’ father, and the King! And recovering from his initial shock, opened the door again.

 

— Achilles! –Alexander, entering in father mode, came back using his best commanding voice— What the hell is going on here?

 

By now his son was dressed in the first tunic he had found and looking extremely embarrassed. His hair disheveled falling over his adorably blushing face, panting and not knowing what to do. Seleucus was still naked, looking for his own cloths.

 

— Are you crazy? Why don’t you knock? –in that moment the Prince truly looked like a common 14 years old boy, all his wits and intelligence had deserted him.

 

— Don’t be smart with me. I am your father and this is my house, I am the one who ask the questions here –by now Alexander was close to shouting, embarrassing Achilles even more, he was sure the whole palace was be able to hear him— What do you think you are doing fucking Seleucus? You are 14 for Zeus’ sake!

 

— So, now you are going to tell me you never did this with daddy when you were my age.

 

— Of course not! When I was your age I was at Mieza studying with Aristotle not screwing my father’s officers –that was half true, at 14 Alexander would have loved to sleep with Hephaistion but he couldn’t thanks to his father’s brilliant idea of raping his beloved.

 

Screwing my father’s officers? –his words hurt his adopted son.

 

— Sire, you don’t have to be so hard with the Prince –Seleucus intervened, unable to stand there watching in silence— I came looking for him and…

 

— I will get to you, Seleucus –the King interrupted him. He was not happy. For him, Achilles was still that innocent boy of 3 years old that had came into their lives at the beginning of the campaign and what he had found in this room when he arrived had shocked him, his perfect innocent son having sex! Oh no, that was not right, not to mention that once he had caught the archihypaspistes with his beloved and now with his adopted son. No, he was not happy at all— Don’t think for a moment I have forgotten about you. 

 

— What’s wrong with you? –said the Prince, he had nothing to say in his defense and was saying the first thing that came to his mind– You are overreacting

 

— Don’t talk to me like that! You have enough problems already, young man –Alexander scolded him— What the hell got into you to do this? First you don’t want an erastes, fine! And now this? Who do you think you are? The son of a blacksmith? A pezetairos’ first born? A catamite? You are Alexander’s son! Do you think is the proper behavior of my son to bed Seleucus?   

 

— I am the commander of your Argyraspides, not a rank soldier –the commander protested— I can’t find any shame in the Crown Prince sharing his bed with me since I am also part of the Macedonian nobility. 

 

— Shut up, Seleucus!

 

— What is going on here? –asked Hephaistion, entering the room— I can hear your screams at the end of the corridor…—but he stopped talking when his brain processed the scene in front of him.

 

Oh, crap! –he thought.

 

— I won’t tolerate this! I won’t have you pleasuring my men as a common whore. You are my son –Alexander kept scolding him, completely ignoring his beloved’s arrival.

 

— So you keep saying but you don’t care of what I have to say on my defense –Achilles was losing his temper, he was embarrassed and scared.

 

— Sire, Achilles can be your son but you have no right to insult him –Seleucus stood in front of him as tall as he was, his unnerving eyes shining with intensity.

 

— I have all the right to do as I bloody want because I am the King –the whole situation was getting out of control and could end really bad unless someone intervene.

 

— Seleucus, would you be so kind to leave us? –asked Hephaistion tranquil and polite in an effort to calm everybody down.

 

— He is not going anywhere, I will have a word with him –said a very angry King.

 

— Yes, of course; but not now –his beloved held his gaze. 

 

Seleucus wasn’t very sure of what to do, he did not want to leave Achilles alone but, on the other hand, it would be less embarrassing for him to be scolded without having his lover in the room. At the end he did as Hephaistion said, making a mental note to talk to the King as soon as he had the change. He was not letting the Prince suffered this alone.

 

— Would you stop yelling and let your son explain himself? –the commander reprehended the King when were left alone— The whole corridor can hear you and I would not be surprised to know Roxanne, at the other side of the palace, wasn’t able to sleep thanks to you.

 

— Achilles was fucking Seleucus and you are scolding me? –Alexander couldn’t believe it until…— You knew! You knew about this, didn’t you?

 

— Yes, I did –this was not how Hephaistion wanted the King to learn about the relationship of these 2 but now there was nothing he could do to remedy this.

 

— And why didn’t you tell me before?

 

— Because both of us have been extremely busy. After I had a long conversation with Achilles you sailed south along the Indus River to reach the Ocean and after that…— Hephaistion puffed his cheeks out— I simply forgot to mention it.

 

Alexander paced around, shaking his head and trying to order his thoughts. He was still in shock but, why exactly? Perhaps because he did the mistake his beloved always warned him not to do, which was to think Achilles was he. Alexander truly felt Achilles was an extension of him and Hephaistion and had wanted his son to find a companion his own age, like had been blessed finding his beloved, not a man older than himself.

 

— Seleucus is your lover? –he wanted to know and his son blushed savagely.

 

— Yes…

 

— The only one?

 

— Of course the only one! Who do you think I am? –only then Alexander understood he was humiliating and insulting his Prince, he had been so shocked he hadn’t stopped to think what was he doing. He took deep breaths forcing himself to calm down. 

 

— I apologize, son –the King spoke slowly and truly sorry— I did not mean it like that, is just…I am in shock, all right?

 

Achilles, holding his cloths with force, nodded. He was shaken after all had been said there. He was embarrassed but more than everything, scared, scared of having lost his adopted father’s respect, to disappoint him.

 

— You did not have to yell...or to call me a common whore –he was hurt.

 

— I am truly sorry, I don’t mean that but understand that I would not have done this if you had told me before Seleucus was your lover –Alexander had a point— Why him?

 

— Why not?

 

— Achilles! –Hephaistion scolded him and his son sighed.

 

— I don’t know. I…I don’t want everyone knowing it, that’s all –answered a very nervous Achilles.

 

— Why not? –Alexander did not understand a thing but his beloved did, he finally was beginning to understand what was happening to his son, after all those months.

 

— You don’t want to care about Seleucus, do you? –asked Hephaistion and the Prince looked at him as if he had read his thoughts— Aki, you don’t want to tell the world he is your lover because you don’t want him to be important and so to avoid being hurt again.

 

— How did you…?

 

— Is that true? –the King was, once again, shocked— Aki, is your father right? –the Prince held his cloths with force and began to cry, even if he did not want to but all this had proven to be too much.

 

Being caught, reprehended and insulted by one of the 2 men he admired the most in the world and now, to have his most intimate and hidden feelings and fears exposed…One moment he had been so happy in Seleucus’ arm, so aroused feeling his body against him and the next…He was scared.

 

— I don’t want him to end like Cyrus and…every time…I…hic…care for someone…they….die or…betray me…hic…—Hephaistion embraced his boy, feeling him trembling in his arms.

 

— Aki –the commander kissed his head— I understand what you feel but…

 

— Do you? How?…hic… dad never… betrayed you…hic… –the Prince interrupted his father.

 

— Aki, listen to me, maybe my best friend did not end like yours but that doesn’t mean I am incapable of understanding your feelings –said the commander, caressing his head tenderly— You can’t hide yourself to avoid being hurt, being hurt is part of life, its what makes us stronger and what makes us appreciate the good moments. You have to trust yourself and your judgment. Cyrus did not betray you, Cyrus was fighting for the Empire of his father, what would you have done in his place?

 

Achilles said nothing, just sobbed against his father’s chest. He felt so weak and fragile in that moment but, to have Hephaistion with him, to feel his arms around him, it could be a very simple thing but that made him feel secured, loved and accompanied. He was not alone and he could trust in someone who would never let him down. 

 

— Aki, you are not alone –said Alexander, approaching him, almost as if he had heard his thoughts— Don’t be like your father always wanting to solve everything by himself –he smiled at Hephaistion— You need others but don’t be afraid to trust in them –the Prince nodded— Besides, if Seleucus hurts you, I swear by my ancestors that I will make him wish he was never born.

 

That made Achilles smiled, not because he wished the commander any harm but because he felt protected. It was tired to be always strong, every once in a while was great to let yourself being pampered. He was feeling much better now.  

 

— Thank you.